Neither this nor that

There are some professions one can do and some that one can’t do. A certain situation in life made me realise that there are many professions I can’t ever engage in. Now that this life-altering realisation has struck, I’m listing them out. What brought on this realisation? And why am I doing something thats seemingly senseless? Read on and I will let you know in a short while.


  • Model– even if I got paid a bomb, and going by the newspaper reports that exactly what I will be getting, I couldn’t do this job for a day. Preening isn’t my thing. Neither is dieting to get a size zero figure.  Plus I’m highly deficient of patience. I wouldn’t have the patience to sit in a chair for hours on end to be made up/dressed up.
  • Security guard– To me sleeping is fun. It is also a great way to de-stress when things get overwhelming. Being a security guard would require me to give up precious sleep. That I couldn’t do.  My not being a “night person” would only be making the situation worse. Besides this is an extremely boring job.
  • Driver– I like driving but free open roads and minimal traffic are what I like. I also like roads on which other drivers follow traffic rules.  Considering the fact that in practically nowhere in India, do people have even the most basic traffic sense, I’d have serious problems if I took on this profession.  If I had to do this job in good ol’ B’bay, the traffic conditions would surely give me a heart attack!
  • Actor– read section on “model”
  • Banker– Too boring. Too monotonous. Work hours that last too long. I suspect they do a lot with numbers and numbers and I don’t get along. Never have. Never will. In short not my cuppa tea.
  • Air hostess– Every time I travel by air, I wonder how they do it. Smile and be so proper all the time. Not a hair outa place, not a word outa order. Could I do it? No. Could I do it if I tried really really hard? Naaaaaaaaaaah!
  • Pre-primary teacher– read section on “model”. The bit about a complete lack of patience in my personality would prevent me from taking up this job. If I did take it up, the poor kids would suffer. And we don’t want that , do we?


List done. Now back to the “why the list” bit.  A couple of days back, a colleague of mine (who, btw, takes pride in his abilities to tease me) and I were generally yapping about everything and nothing. Somewhere while meandering through a directionless conversation, he made a jab about how I never made it to the modelling industry with my “perfect” height.  For those who don’t know me, I’d like to inform you that I am probably the most inappropriate person to put into the modelling field- to begin with I never make the cut-off for the height requirement. My maladjusted to the industry would only add to an already pathetic situation. The colleague was promptly told that height or no height, modelling just wasn’t the thing for me.  The conversation got me thinking about what else I couldn’t do to make a living. That’s what brought on the list. And you thought that there was some great, big reason behind it? 😛

37 thoughts on “Neither this nor that

  1. “Not a hair outa place”???

    is einstein cut your favorite? 😛 😀

    and thank God, someone in this world is a little low on height. seems these days all the kids are going above the normal height.

  2. burf- havent u seen those air hostesses?? its like their hair is glued together or smthing.. its almost unnatural..
    i see u r being rather kind on the height issue… 😀

  3. aha! that’s somethng now. Now that you’ve striked out model, makes me think that you considered it in the first place. So you have the ideal height/figure etc to become a model but you dont/cant. 😉
    BTW you can list the professions that you probably CAN take up if you want.Another timepass 🙂

  4. I enjoyed reading this post:)And I think although Model, air hostess,driver, banker, pre-primary teacher are not my cup of tea either I would make a very good security guard, or a security in charge! I would put infra red sensors, security cameras, burglar alarms and huge spot lights!
    You should also do a post on what you’d like to do…a chef, a dancer, a rock star, a dress designer?? A painter, or a writer:)

  5. You know I always wanted to be an airhostess.I even went for the interview but I knew I would never take it up cos my dad said before going for the interview.Tell them you wont do night shifts !!! That was so funny….as if they were waiting for me with open arms and would accept whatever I said 🙂 I am gald I didnt take it up cos after flying a few times I realised it was hard work! About the others I dont know.Would have loved to be a model.Sit pretty and get paid a bomb!!! But me being average height would be a problem.Add to the fact I am very shy around strangers.Taught pre-primary for a year while in college as a part time job.Hats off to the teachers who have considered it their vocation.I thought I was pretty patient till I had to handle 35 energetic kids!!!

  6. @lively- as kids dont we think of taking up just about any profession?i think i thot of taking up the job of an airhostess for all of 30 secs! wat profession can i do? the exact one i am in!! social work suit me just fine. thank u very much! btw, i am also a qualified teacher but i wudnt dare teaching kids under 10 years of age… but gv me middle school kids, and i’l do a decent job.. 😀

    @indianhomemaker- u had me rolling with laughter with ur “I would make a very good security guard”!somehow i nvr wud have pictured u as one (dnt ask me why..i donno…its just one of those things that i cant explain!).but i have to admit,with the red sensors, security cameras, burglar alarms and huge spot lights, ur job would be rather exciting! read my response to lively to figure out wat professions i wud like to be in.. 😀

    @snippetsnscribbles-welcome to the club!!! 😀

    @homecooked- all dads are like that..over-protective about their daughter..but then that what makes them dads ,rt? wudnt u find modelling tiring? i wud…my mum’s a pre-primary teacher and she pretty darn good at her job.. i dont know how she does it!!

    @burf- i shud hv known you’d say something like that!!!!

  7. burf- SARCASTIC AND ME!??!! you kidding me or wat?i cud never be sarcastic…but there is a teeeeenie weeenie possibility that i might be teasing.. 😛

  8. 😀 i am [seriously] glad that you are not sarcastic. i hate sarcasm although i guess it is one of the most inherent quality to witty peeps

    :O teasing… hmmm… 😕 😀

  9. burf- i can be sarcastic but i save it for situations that truly warrantit..u cant deny it does make the conversation more engaging/intersting sometimes… 😀

  10. :-)))

    Good list…:-))

    Why dont u wnat to be abanker??

    Well I would prefer to be an investment banker…its just too good…may be retail banker is boring….

    When I was kid…I usually dreamt of being a air hostess:-))

    Apart frm next job for me wud be a journalist..:-))

  11. Tha’s real nice bud. Someday… someday in future I’d wish to be a teacher and just as you said teaching middle school or high school. But I am not qualified for that. I wont mind teaching smaller kids either.
    True, as kids we have so many dreams so much imagination. Wonder where it all goes?

  12. lol

    sure does, that’s why i said it can be a very potent tool in the hands of witty people… and very unpleasant/irritating one in the hands of some…

  13. @chakoli- i know zilch about bankers in general..i tend to club them all into one broad, boring category!a journalist sounds like a good idea to me..thats probably something i cud have done…had my linguistic skills been better! 😀

    @lively-i donno girl where all that imagination goes..sad that we lose our power to imagine as we grow older..

    @burf-ok..we agree on this one then 😀

  14. I think I would find it a bit tiring being a model.I mean always having a smile on your face and more improtantly always having makeup on your face.Smile,I can manage but dont think I can manage make-up 🙂

  15. @chakoli- i thot there was no limit to how much one cud improve!! but thanks for the vote of confidence:D

    @burf- not surprising..SUPER surprising… why wud i have an off today? is there some festival today?

    @homecooked-ditto. the make up’s simply impossible.. the smile can be managed but not on all days and at all times..

  16. burf- huh??? havent u noticed..i hv been doing there min-disappearing acts for a while now..they dnt mean i am non-existant!!! the weekend has nthing to do with it!! actually sometimes it does…but nt this time.. ! 😛
    btw, ideas for an un-exciting new post are churning in my head…

  17. What made put up this list?!
    I think it takes a lot of guts and sacrifice to be a model/actor. It’s not a normal person’s profession, very few can handle the stress associated with fame.

  18. @chakoli- 😀

    @Lively-sorrrrrrrrrrrrrrry girl!! donno hw i missed that comment!!!apologies apologies…refer to response to snippetsnscribbles to know why nothing new has shown up on this space..

    @neeti- sure i can handle it!!!i managed to sit in the same class as u for two year dint i??? how hard wud it be to teach you… assuming u can be taught at all! 😛

    @niv- yup..its stressful n its not something everyone can do..its surely something i cant do!!

    @snippetsnscribbles-i know i know!! i hv so much in my head that i need to blog about but work has been driving me crazy… i hvnt had much time to put my thots down.. in fact its been so long since i blogged or read other’s blogs that im beginning to think i am missing out something imp.!!plus when u hvnt written in a while u keep thinking u will write one absolutely fantastic piece when u finally get to it.. but neither do u really get to it, nor do u come up with anything fantastic!sigh..

  19. Now to make up for the mistake you’ve done. You are indeed gonna write something fantashtic! wokhay? How about a fairytale? It makes me happy, so…

  20. @lively- i will try to do my best, your majesty. a fairtale? and from me? u gotto be kidding me!! i dont think i can do fictional stuff at all…may be one day i’ll give it a try but i dont think i’d be too good at it!

  21. lol…yes homecooked…someone is supposed to be home but i think she has left on an extended vacation!!expected to be back soon…:D

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