The father says she can study but she shouldn’t work. Working women are not the family’s tradition and tradition are sacrosanct.
I say who are you to decide whether she should work or not? If you are getting her an education only to get her a good match, I suggest you don’t. Let the engineering seat go to someone who will really use it. But then you decided what she will study, where she will study, who her friends will be and what she will wear, so yes, it makes sense to you to decide if she can work or not.
The NRI says things look good but his parents insist that the horoscopes must match for a marriage to take place.As per the family’s tradition nothing proceeds unless the horoscopes match perfectly.
I say if that’s as forward thinking and global you are, you aren’t forward thinking and global enough for me!
The mother says its for her 20 year old son to date a “wild” 16 year old Christian, just so long as he doesn’t ever intend marrying her. Marriage, whenever it takes place, would have to be with one who qualifies- a “homey” Brahmin from a “good” family. He can have his fun in the mean while. What had he to lose? He’s the boy after all. The girl’s parents should worry.
I say I have no words. If you think its alright for your son to have a “good time” with someone else’s daughter because he wouldn’t ever have to bear the consequences, I think you need a paradigm shift. That’s how things work in your world but that’s not how they should work. Your son is as responsible for any action as that girl. If anything, more so- he’s older. And I can’t believe you are actually bringing up your child that way- to be so disrespectful toward women. Its so disgusting I don’t know what to say.
The mother-in-law say she doesnt expect her daughter-in-law to give up her job just because she’s married her son. She has accepted the trend of the naya zamana. She doesn’t care if she works full time, just so long as she makes two types of breakfast to meet the fussy family’s needs before going to office and comes home in the evening to prepare another two types of dinner, cleans up afterwards, indulges in chit-chat to keep her entertained in the evening and then spends time to help her child finish up his home work. It isnt just the immediate family. The odd relative that drops by on almost every weekend must be shown the best hospitality as well. Paid work is all fine, but she can’t ignore houseworkand commitments to the family, can she?
I say its unfair to treat your own daughter like a queen when you treat someone else’s daughter like a maid. A human being is a human being, whether born to you or not. How can you differentiate between two and be so guileless about it?
The employer says we don’t have too many women in the team because of the work we do- its too demanding, women don’t stick around long enough, don’t cope too well.
I say we don’t give the facilities required, we don’t make adjustments to accommodate family needs, we don’t pay enough, we don’t care.
They say the times have changed. I say we are fooling ourselves. Tell me just what has changed.
Note: the matter for the post has been collected from real life conversations or incidents that I have encountered that have left me shocked and upset. Yes, I am as disappointed with the world as you are. Do we really need to keep discovering it as we grow up? Childhood oblivion was bliss. Literally.